Bishop Barron on Morality, Character, and Relationships

100 thoughts on “Bishop Barron on Morality, Character, and Relationships

  1. @psiroki I have said nothing about my relationship with the Eucharist, but it is OK because there are those who feel they find the fullness of the teachings without it. This whole exchange started as a response to your statement that there was a depth to Christianity that one could not experience without attending mass. While this may be your experience I do not feel that is a judgement that you are in any way qualified to make as regards the experience of someone else.

  2. @BalladoftheWindfish I understand your point, however, I am speaking not to our individual beliefs, but how, given them, we interface with others. Let's turn the table; say one who has left the church insists that only through freeing yourself from the Church's dogma can you find the true richness of a personal relationship with God and that you don't know the limitations of your faith. Is that likely to sway you? Does this person have any right to judge your personal relationship with God…

  3. @BalladoftheWindfish … and the path you choose in nurturing it? Is their position going to make it easier or more difficult for the two of you to have a relationship where you see Christ in one another? My point? Even though we may feel that ours is the most rewarding and true path to God, can we truly see beyond our own path? Can we know how God may work through the life of another? Doesn't claiming to result in the opposite of that for which we claim to be striving, namely, Divine Love?

  4. @itslifeisall That's no fullness of teachings if you dismiss parts of the teachings. If she would say she doesn't believe Jesus ever said that, I understand. Otherwise I'd love to know the grounds of dismissal.

    On the other hand in some sense you're right, since our knowledge is imperfect (1 Cor 13,12) and God acts where he pleases (John 3,8), so who am I to judge. Nobody has the fullness of the truth in this world.

  5. @TibbieT By "she" I meant quezcatol's sister.

    The other things you said: ouch. That hurt, although it's not true: I believe you're misinterpreting things.

  6. @TibbieT I can agree with you: that site looks a little bit strange to say the least.

    Anyway I'm leaving the thread, I don't feel I have anything more to add.

  7. I agree with Sax's view on the 'hook-up' culture, and his book is indeed an important part of the current scholarship taking place among sex/gender differences & similarities. However, I would also suggest Rebecca Jordan-Young's book 'Brain Storm' for parents, which alerts us to lasting 'scientific' claims about the sexes.

  8. Having listened attentively to the stories of my elders, I think you overestimate the idea of commitment 10, 15, 25, 35, 65, etc. years ago.

    That said, I have noticed in my experience that the most saintly people tend to be the morally hardest on themselves while the most abhorent people tend to be most satisfied with their inner goodness.

  9. @JohnnyDavidson90

    As far as I know, the Catholic Church is the only church that requires its priesthood to have a degree in philosophy. It may be that many think the duty of paying deference to authority means questioning nothing, however I doubt that this is the disposition of the Catholic clergy in general. I've met some seriously smart priests who are also for the record also very moral in their private lives.

  10. In general, priests are deeply intellectuals. They do have different personalities but packed with wisdom. Normally people who think they have the smartest brains tries to challenge a clergy with nonsense irrelevant issues. In reality, the opponents cannot come to terms because they have a difficulty combining the nature of body & soul. No matter how a priest explains it, they cannot comprehend.

  11. I disagree, priests are very similar to Doctors. They both have a calling to become what they are, to undergo the hardships that come with their education. "An MD forms his intellect from empirical scientific research. A knowledge base that is constantly open to free criticism based on evidence and peer review, that develops as theories and evidence progress." While a religious education does have absolutes, many tenets of faith are constantly being debated due to biblical evidence and research.

  12. "religious education has absolutes that can never be changed moved or adapted, as a result this fundamentally undermines the purpose of a education."
    I have to disagree with this since there are two different educations involved with Priests and MDs. What I was trying to say is that both Doctors and Priests have to undergo an education that involves study/hardships. One is a medical education, while the other is religious education. Education on these absolutes can lead to debate btw religious.

  13. Yes. This is what's known as "Natural Law".

    Sigmund Freud was a devout athiest, but the most interesting thing about Freud was that his views on sex were very similiar to those of the Catholic Church. that anyone having casual, contraceptive sex is a pervert..Because people are just animals, Freud believed they upset the strong biological instinct to progenate, when they use contraceptives, therefore causing, mental illness and nervous breakdowns.

    We're wired for God. We can't help it.

  14. My life, on a dark path. At 33 I am back in the church and thirst for truth and God. In retrospect, it was drinking and hook up culture that led me for so many years down a Godless path of self ritchous and self justifying behavior. I have been with ALOT of women. Cause it was easy to pass on doing what was right. It was easier to sucum to desire. It has changes with the grace of God. Jesus has shown me the real path. I am happier now than EVER and IT ALL MAKES SENSE!!!! 🙂

  15. Father B.. are you planning to review Shame and Young Adult? I think these movies are a good starting point for discussing the sins of vanity and lust.. what do u think?

  16. Your comment illustrated the great amount of ignorance you possess. First of all, the term "devout atheist" is an oxymoron; it doesn't exist. Second, the responsible use of contraception has nothing, whatsoever, to do with casual sex; every devoted and faithful person within holy marriage who uses contraception is taking the responsibility to do so; they are not involved in casual sex. Partners in marriage have sex a far greater number of times than the number of children which they may have.

  17. I'll concede about the term "devout athiest", but contraception is wrong. Look at the statistics of contraception. Family life, in the West, started falling apart when contraception became prevalent. Also, I don't believe one can have a true romantic relationship with contraception. Contraception is selfish because it prevents a person from *entirely* giving oneself to the other. True love is uncoditional and uncompromising.

  18. 1) Your reply indicates that, if you read my initial reply, you either didn't comprehend it, or the truth of it failed to resonate. Giving oneself entirely to another is an emotional commitment; the physical expression of that is only a part of it. Using contraception (ie, being responsible) has nothing to do with giving oneself to another. You said, "True love is unconditional and uncompromising". Nothing can be both unconditional and uncompromising. (Continued).

  19. 2) Being uncompromising means that you have certain standards which you will not alter; that is being specifically conditional, the exact opposite of being unconditional. True love is also specifically conditional, not unconditional in any way. Anyone who believes the empty cliche' that true love is unconditional is an utter fool. What makes someone love someone? Recognizing the attributes which they possess which gives them value to the person who loves them. (Continued).

  20. 3) Those attributes are the reasons WHY someone loves them. If true love was actually unconditional, then any decent man could express true love to any gutter slut he encounters. Any person could express true love to any total stranger. Because there would be no considerations which would determine the basis for that love. If Freud believed that using contraception caused mental illness and nervous breakdowns, then Freud was an ignorant fool. (Continued).

  21. 4) If the Catholic church is in agreement with Freud in this perspective, then the Catholic church is as ignorant and foolish as Freud was. You mentioned statistics; the only statistic regarding using contraception which is legitimate is that it approaches 100% in preventing pregnancy, which, consequently, eliminates the possible consideration of any abortions. And an abortion-free world sounds great to me. How does it sound to you? Secondarily, adoption is preferable, allowing a child a life.

  22. – "Using contraception (ie, being responsible) has nothing to do with giving oneself to another." –

    1. No. It's only a perception that using contraceptives is being responsible. And, part of the self is being withheld in contraception. 2. I'm not familiar of your personal definitions of "unconditional" and "uncompromising."

  23. 1) Your first comment in reply is simply too ignorant and foolish to even give any credence to by bothering to address it. 2) I don't have "personal definitions" of words; I explained to you the exact definitions of "unconditional" and "uncompromising", and when, and how, they are appropriately used, which you obviously did not know. Your personal ignorance (and, yes, "personal ignorance", unlike "personal definitions", does exist) is your concern, not mine.

  24. You can answer that question for yourself; do you actually believe that using contraception causes mental illness and nervous breakdowns? Would any sane, rational, even semi-intelligent person believe such utter nonsense? No, because is ridiculous. I don't waste time with the incredibly stupid.

  25. Did I say using contraceptives causes mental illness? Or are you just putting words in my mouth? What I'm saying is that the use of contraceptives comes along with a certain philosophy of life that promotes anxiety and despair.

  26. 1) You said that Freud believed that when people use contraceptives it causes mental illness and nervous breakdowns. And you said that the most interesting thing about Freud was that his views on sex were very similiar to those of the Catholic church. Your words, both in reply to BalladoftheWindfish four months ago. If you are stating this in a comment, then you believe it, so, yes, you are saying it. You put your own words in your mouth, then put them in a comment. (Continued).

  27. 2) Then you stated, "What I'm saying is that the use of contraceptives comes along with a certain philosophy of life that promotes anxiety and despair." Which is utter nonsense, of course. So much so that I can't imagine why anyone would even state it. To the contrary, the responsible use of contraception prevents anxiety and despair; the anxiety and despair which someone would experience if they don't responsibly use contraception, and are faced with the horrific consideration of abortion.

  28. – "To the contrary, the responsible use of contraception prevents anxiety and despair" – The use of contraceptives makes it possible for one to have sex whenever they want, with little or no repercussions. Does that sound responsible to you? Is getting what you want, when you want usually considered repsonsible behavior?

  29. A little clue for you; many people were engaging in sex whenever they wanted to long before contraception was even developed; so, there is no correlation between the two. Nor does that have any correlation to responsibility. Nor does "getting what you want, when you want it", as you said, have anything to do with the concept of responsibility, either. So, considering that your entire comment was wrong, and completely pointless, why did you even make it?

  30. Father Barron, You make it sound like this "hook up" culture is something new. This is simply a progression of what has been going on for quite some time. From Sinatra's rat pack, to free love, to casual marriage, homosexuality, birth control, abortion, etc. This is all part of the same trajectory. It is cold. How do expect young people to act when marriage/family has fallen apart? Adam and Eve gave us away to the devil, but you need to go that far back to see parents who have done the same.

  31. No, 30 years ago, people were doing the same things. Many of them have left the Church and/or have perished in some way. Sin has consumed an entire generation almost 30 years ago.

  32. Clearly John Paul asserts that every moral act creates the individual's authentic personality but he assumes the definition of moral act to be those teachings of the Church. The flaw is that morality is not a fixed point but a floating concept that varies with the leadership of given society. At one time it was immoral to eat meat on Friday. Slavery was once regarded as a moral institution by both church and scripture. Morality must first be defined as providing for the good of the person.

  33. Nonsense! Talk to Justice Ann Burke, supreme court justice of Illinois, who was a member of the national review board looking into matters of sexual misconduct by priests. She has consistently said that Cardinal Ratzinger was the Vatican official who most understood this issue and acted to set it right.

  34. Great video! Too bad we always have modern day Pharisees trying to undermine God's work because they buy into the lies of the enemy. They're going to be SO surprised when they go before Jesus to be judged!

  35. My advice to you is to procure a brown scapular and wear it always, after praying to Mary that, if it be God's will for you that you return to the Church, she may obtain for you 1) the grace of having a strong desire for the Church and 2) a smoothing of the obstacles.
    Much has changed in recent years. Priests used to have both FERVOR and top-notch education in philosophy, theology, Greek and Latin (at least). For why we have "unpriestly" priests, check out the book AA-1025. It explains lots.

  36. Thank you Fr.Barron! Your lessons have really impacted my life in such a positive/ lovely way. I listen to you video's while at work and I know the holy spirit has come thru each lesson. I hope that all people can hear God's voice thru your heart, mind and spirit. I know I have. I've gone thru many hardships in my life and God keeps filling my heart with love each time I suffer thru deep sadness.Pope John Paul's book, theology of the body is great book! God Bless you, your in my prayers always.

  37. I have enormous respect for you Father Barron, but I must say that's not an answer to kiwichristian.

    If I can ask in all graciousness, did Pope Benedict XVI write a policy somewhat along that vein in "De delictus gravioribus", the document I believe kiwi is referring to?

    Here's a copy of the document: ww w . vatican . va/archive/aas/documents/AAS%2093%20%5B2001%5D%20-%20ocr . pdf. (pgs 785-788). I can't read Latin, I've read that you do.

    Any clarification of the matter is appreciated.

  38. The other thing that brings up questions is a May 2001 letter he apparently sent to bishops:

    "(Sexual abuse allegations should be dealt with)…in the most secretive way… restrained by a perpetual silence… and everyone… is to observe the strictest secret which is commonly regarded as a secret of the Holy Office… under the penalty of excommunication". (The Guardian)

    Justice Ann Burke's opinion is interesting, but I take primary source quotes over even someone as distinguished as her.

  39. Because you, the general Catholic populace, do not elect anyone; a small group of people do, and you are forced to accept whatever decision they make. Hardly sounds democratic, or even ethical, as a matter of process, does it? No, it does not.

  40. Great points Fr Barron. As working class Irish Catholic, who admired JFK's leadership but had difficulty squaring his reported infidelities with his presidency – this behavior had to impact his character and does matter. Society today says this is private business and doesn't matter in relation to public office (The Bill Clinton scandal and the same argument from the secular society). Thanks for clarifying this and anchoring this discussion in logic and the truth. Very helpful.

  41. Excellent points. Sad. That Women are the ones who primarily fall into this trap. They want the same things that men get out of a one night stand and end up paying with it with emotional damage. Its the deviant culture that says. Hey everyone do what you want, its all good. Guess what?? Its not. Young girls and boys in highschool should watch this.

  42. living abstinence is 1. a discipline that men and women choose themselves. no one is forced into the priesthood or religious life. 2. the living of abstinence has not produced a single abuser/predator; indeed, it is clear that NOT living abstinence is at the heart of abuse.

  43. Strange how there was a time when what father B says in this video was so obvious and now we find ourselves in a time where people object to a moral truth. Keep them coming father B. Im sure your helping a lot of people who have never heard these views. God bless you for what you do.

  44. Really Joseph?? Theres really a child abuse scandal with priests? ? No one knew that. Wake up man. Your comments are pure hatred. Justice should be served but your anti Catholicism is obvious. I feel sorry for you

  45. Apparently reason, if you ever possessed a trace of it, in the first place, has abandoned you. Of course someone who is living abstinence can be abusive; if either person within marriage is living abstinence, they are being abusive to their spouse by denying them their right to marital relations as granted by the state of marriage. (We are not talking a probability of behavior here, we are talking a possibility of being abusive by living abstinence, which was the sole point).

  46. Apparently reason, if you ever possessed a trace of it, in the first place, has abandoned you. Of course someone who is living abstinence can be abusive; if either person within marriage is living abstinence, they are being abusive to their spouse by denying them their right to marital relations as granted by the state of marriage. (We are not talking a probability of behavior here, we are talking a possibility of being abusive by living abstinence, which was the sole point).

  47. no. the point was about predation in relation to children, not deprivation in marriage. i know staying in context is something you dont do often, making your comments irrelevant often, but give it a try sometime.

  48. Thank you, Fr. Barron. I just realized that the Walter White character in Breaking Bad demonstrates this truth pretty well. 

  49. Backbone and character – we need shedloads of it living in todays 'anything goes' culture. Fr. Barron speaks words of wisdom here. How do we instil it in our young I suppose is the next question. 

  50. as a youth pastor in an evangelical church (in the small country of Norway) I have to say – this is some very wise and simple-to-understand teaching about these topics! Thank you so much father, for dealing with these issues in such a direct, yet inviting way!

  51. In Estonia as in many parts of Scandinavia, they have a very healthy relationship with the mind and body. It is not uncommon to see a fully topless women having a shower while advertising shampoo or else naked bodies shown in the sauna. So why this way – well – it is not the showing of the human body that constitutes any "sin" it is the thought processes that individuals go through in response to what they see. In Scandinavia, the human body is seen as a very normal thing, an every day thing – not necessarily an object of sexual lust. This state of mind is therefore the key ingredient in this debate. Sin is a concept that is "all in the mind". 

  52. The assumption made here off course is that it is immoral to engage in a sexual act – presumably meaning outside of marriage. Such "black and white" rules are too constrained for the real world and do not reflect the human intellect for discussion. I'm sure their are many such interactions outside marriage that are completely appropriate and others that may not be so. As to which brings a smile and which brings a frown is entirely based on the "facts of the case" as the Lawyers would say. It would be a deeply personal thing based on the state of mind of the two people concerned. Morality is always in flux and is never truly fixed both in time and with time. That is why religion will always lag behind in such debates. What was immoral yesterday might be moral tomorrow and vice versa. We can all pick examples of this principle that we are comfortable with.   

  53. May be the deaths of 6 people in California is the result of what hookup culture taught Elliot Rodger … yes he was mentally ill and yes we are blaming the politicians about the gun rights but  why are we not asking why Elliot Rodger hated humanity ?? 
    PS: Thank you father for your meaningful videos. 

  54. I have seen something different from what Fr. Barron has observed.  Overall, the young people I see are better than the youth of my day in trying to live a moral life.  Many if not most take great strides in altruism, faith, and avoid casual physical relationships.  However, many of the youth do make the same mistake we made when we were younger, and that is to set your own standards for morality.   Over the years I have come to accept not how much I know, but how little I know.  I have also seen some of the smartest, richest, coolest, and toughest people get cut down by the hazards of life.  Since I accept that I know very little, especially compared to scholars like Fr. Barron, then I must keep learning or live in great peril of falling as well.  Thus, staying anchored in the local church, daily seeking God, and listening to scholars for me is a necessity.  Young people naturally need to be different and rebel.  My advice is to stay connected to the source of truth and then you will know whose "butt to kick", and what direction to direct your energy.  There are examples in history where some young person stands in front of a king or a pope and gives an order of great political consequence, and one of the most powerful people on Earth basically says "yes ma'am".  That is because power recognizes power.  Don't cut yourself off from the source of all power that is good, by doing it your own way.  Keep learning (and teaching), and you will have the power to make a difference.  Older people like to learn from both scholars, and energetic young people who want to make a difference and push us to do better / try harder.

  55.   I remember being taught that in Genesis God rested on that 7th day and it was then that he turned over to His creation the task of bringing all of Creation to fulfillment.  When a person sins he brings de-creation into the picture. The effect of this is like a stone being thrown into a pool of water; the ripples it makes are consequences of that sin on the Christian community. The effect on him is the de-creation of his person or a disintegration of his personality. The teacher used to say that there is no such thing as a "nervous breakdown"; it's the disintegration of the personality caused by sin.  I learned so much from that Friar. God Bless Him!!!! I just remembered his named was Father Aquinas, we called him AQ!!!!

  56. Surely it is character that gives rise to actions rather than actions which give rise to character. The golfer who swings the club badly over and over again is not becoming a bad golfer because he already is one. He swings the club badly because he already is a bad golfer. Anyway, that's how I see that. On a new point it is good to hear that the present Pope is marrying co-habiting couples and couples with children – in St Peter's !! I think JP2's moral rules are getting over hauled here! Good to see. I like this new Pope – he's sort of a guy we can do business with !!

  57. Father Barron, I love you man! You have no idea how much..and I don't say this often, only to my mother and wife.. God bless you

  58. Creation is so complex it is impossible to know who you really are that's why God placed Grace in the way but in Grace that processes the hidden manna you can only take a little bit at a time but a little bit is more than enough to have a perfect understanding of all things you must be completely emptied out of Alpha, its concepts and it ideas and in except the concepts and ideas of the omega you must mental fast, fast on nothing but the purity of thought without the imagination of the heart it will put you in a Nother spiritual frequency and the 12 disciples sitting on the 12 thrones judging the 12 tribes of Israel can judge you, what's your judged there is no getting out there is no escape cast him into other darkness. not cast him out, where there should be weeping and gnashing of teeth, there is no escape

  59. Really well put, I love how logically you tie everything together, i hope i can be a man of good character 🙂 i will try my best God help me!

  60. "Lust is not bad. Because of this lust, you have been born as human beings. It is due to this very lust that you will turn from men into God. But even if lust is there in you, don't put it into action. From the spiritual point of view, lust is the worst possible weakness. The real hero is he who successfully fights it.

    "Fornicating with a woman who isn't your wife is one of the worst possible sins. What had to happen has happened; but from now on, beware of carnality. Follow my orders and stay away from lust. What lasting pleasure can one derive from such stinking parts? It can destroy your spirit and character, as well as infect the body."

    Meher Baba

  61. Hi Father,
    You probably have already read it, but if you haven't, Miriam Grossman's Unprotected book is an excellent "scientific proof" of the truth of the deposit of faith and, in particular of sexual morality

  62. I have an incredibly beautiful adult daughter who is in love with a woman, in a way that is anything but casual or "hooking up." She is exactly who God made her to authentically be, and I love her deeply. This is the thing, more than any other, that keeps me from the church: I look at her mutual love for this woman, and I see the exact same kind of love that my husband and I have for each other. They show the same mutual respect and loving-kindness, but they are same-sex instead of opposite-sex partners. My attitude towards their relationship is not born of "modern culture;" rather it comes from seeing love as love.

  63. Not sure if you've made the connection, but St Paul's words in 1 Corinthians 10:31 come to mind, "Therefore whatever you eat and drink, and in everything you do, do all to the glory of God." it makes tremendous sense in light of what you point out here, taking it being a simple "ought." In fact, Paul probably realized the same thing: the importance of attending to all the little things, and doing them to God's glory, because each of them further shapes the character itself toward His glory and into His light. Thanks!

    –May the Lord bless you and keep you.

  64. A Catholic priest is NOT QUALIFIED to comment on Morality,, Character and Relationships. I was attacked by a priest in a public restroom when I was 10 years old.

  65. Can't help but be awed by the richness, Your Excellency! Many thanks for the sweet and sound delivery! Please pray for me, a Filipino seminarian, as I enter theological studies!

  66. i am some one who thinks that it reeks of an old man trying to creat love and sexual arthmitic its a aspect of the truth but still an aspect he was a great leader but no teacher on high school sex i would listen to pope fransis any day on this
    leave it to a pope to say how sex should go down to a married couple

  67. bless the good things bout the catholic book of sex teaches wich is trust and love and no gay ass orgies and free never ending birth contoll when times are tough monny wise but thats small compared to the stuff that should be there

  68. Any act you do, simply put, any thought you consent to, any word you say, is rooted in developing your "metaphysical industry- for one trajectory or another" as it were… that's St. John Paul 2's principle, it seems, put into geopolicial grand-strategy gaming terms.
    Does that about make sense, Bishop Barron?

  69. "You're also… shaping the person you're becoming." I'd say, Bishop Barron, not merely with what you do but also with what you focus on*; I found a lot of attitudes that are downright far more deadly to the life of grace in us that're totally chaste, but downright brutal, in world history- and that's scary… I'm not saying even remotely that I plan on abandoning current events or world history (both of these being sources of those attitudes, but I'll stay far away from current events to keep my soul safe for the time being only at least), but I *am saying that we've got to keep our guard up, even as we study things like Church history, especially the history of the 20th Century. As a mentor of mine put it: "What you focus on becomes what you are." to me once.

  70. Bishop BARROOM, you said of the possibility that Hell doesn't exist and that of the possibility that no one goes to HELL? ? What religion do you represent? Are you really a Catholic bishop? What seminary did you graduate from…99Cent Store? 7/11store or maybe Walmart? What a sacrilegious statement from a supposed bright bishop.. You goofed. .. Yet you have scandalized Christian and non Christian alike. If there is no hell, well, we don't need you around nor the church for that matter. Think before you talk…damn it!!!!: YOU are a Catholic bishop and your words can influence, inspire or scandalize and send somebody or a lot to HELL. Look at your mirror and remind yourself that you have a big responsibility and liability in saving souls. ….NOT DAMNING THEM. You crap

  71. Metaphysical Martial Arts: No stronger stance than truth (love). Morality and character comes from truth (love).

    Absence of it comes from ignorance (greed).

  72. im a person who like messy , mature and phical love. i like all those girls that like to get high and dress up like their dnd charterers and dont fall into the basic bibel thumping girl that spends all day praying and jugging others. my gal pals are folks that jp2 would have loved to control on how they dress how they date and what job they should get. the underling thems i from this stuff is to live in fear of your self and scola norms that keep folks who like me love god but like to fool around(even if they are not haveing sex and just playing the bases. which is how i tend to go about love before marage) and it gets down right legistc and makes a lattor of who the pastor is more willing to show love towerds. i have seen it with how capuse fathers treat the layity kids and the only ones that they work with are the ones that bend down to them. their are a lot of values i can take away from jp2 work but non that i cant find in the bibel or talking to my family. so in the end this not a assault on the church as whole but the youth this generation that have formed cult like groupes like a life teen and focus. some of them spit on the divorced and think them selfs better than everyone which as you have said father is not how you evangelize. this great youth movment that jp2 started is not going to end well for so many like it did me . i still go to church when ever i can but i go to my fam when i realy need healing or a very good Lutheran pastor that has saved my soul. i say these things not out hate but personal advice.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *