So odds are if you’ve been on Instagram
in the past like, oh god I don’t know, like few weeks… you’ve probably noticed a
phenomenon that’s been taking over Instagram stories. See– Alright. My degree
and a yard of Twix just came tumbling down, alright, I don’t even know where
to segway from that. That just kind of threw me off. So since it’s a snowy icy
mess outside, I’m gonna take today to go ahead and have some fun with some of
these Instagram stories and also show you where to find them so you can find
out what Disney character you are, what freaking plant you are, what electronic
you are, what Pokemon you are, what lens you are, what rubber band ball you are,
what gin you are, what… I don’t know. What– what deodorant you are, or what freaking
chapstick you are, what Swiss Army knife you are, yeah so I’m kind of stuck here
at the studio at my desk. Thankfully I have a lot of entertainment behind me
also so why don’t we just go ahead and dive right into the video.
I’m gonna go ahead and show you guys where to find these right now so from
the home screen what you’re gonna do is you’re gonna swipe over to your
Instagram stories as you can see I have a lot of crap here so on the bottom here
you notice that there are some little icons I’ve already saved some of these
because I want those readily accessible so let’s go over to one of these like
blossom for example so you see at the bottom here you can tap and you can also
browse effects and then from there you’ll find I mean my internet isn’t
loading because I’m technically connected to my camera right now so but
this is where they’ll pop up I promise I mean I’m not gonna sit here and lie to
you so I am going to go ahead and have fun
with some of these and let’s find out what whatever I am which Disney are you
we’re gonna start off with finding who I am really is that is that who who uh who I
remind you of I think I’m gonna sue honestly I don’t think I’m the Hunchback
I mean I my posture is kind of crap right now so maybe I should like raise
his destiny a little bit okay yay for good posture oh that was a nice
little awareness check alright let’s try it again I’m feeling confident this time
are you kidding again doing it I guess I need to raise
my desk even higher now this is like this is like peak sit-up this this is
peak right here oh yeah alright we’re gonna stick with it third time’s the
charm you know I’m hoping that this one is the one Pumbaa really am i this ugly
dang bro God can I just get one good character okay one more time one more
time one more time this is this is fine this is fine Simba I’m okay with that I think that’s
a good note to end on even though you’re still saying on childish I’m feeling
really good about this next one bro why I haven’t seen that movie in a
minute now that I think about it I might do that today
hey Google Ad watching Hercules to the to-do lists today so that’s what Disney
are you clearly I’m just destined have either villains or just not good people
so why don’t we do 2020 predictions that sounds like a fun one
fabulous I’m hoping this is gonna be a fabulous year 2019 I’m not gonna lie all
2019 just took a dump on me and then like smeared it all over my face and
then gave me a swirly and then stole the other half of my Kit Kat bar that’s
offensive so next up we have 2020 at a glance so let’s see what my 2020 is
gonna be according to this thing nothing is never not impossible what is
that a quadruple negative so nothing is never cancels out
not impossible cancels out so possible so possible so next up we have where
should you vacation next let’s see what we get nowhere you’re broke
look I have a bag of change here yeah who’s broke now that could probably get
me like I don’t know maybe the West County all right all right nah for real
for it let’s let’s let’s see where I’m going
this year know where you’re broke I’m noticing a trend here I have some
foreign money out here actually and that’s worth more than ours I’ve euros
that completely craps on our dollar I don’t know where it’s at though that’s
the problem okay attracts landfill bro why I’m
already home whoa there’s like 50 of me bro oh my god it’s
a resident nantes subscribe today oh my god y’all didn’t need to see that Oh
what pokemons oh my let’s find out what Pokemon I am Oh give me something spicy
give me something Kabuto I’m a fossil you calling me old look I’m already mad
because when I go out in public I don’t even get carded anymore I’m 25 bro have
I aged that poorly like if I want to get a beer at a restaurant no one’s like can
I see some ID sir they’re always just like oh yeah sure here you go you fossil
would you like the the freakin senior discount with that oh my god bro I think
we’re capable of somebody better I think we can do better as a Pokemon so we’re
gonna go ahead and see if we get marowak that means I’m dead bro I’m dead cuz
remember remember in the first Pokemon game when like cubone was upset about
his mother being dead so not only that i’m a mom
where was the daddy marowak can we talk about that where was dad cuz you know in
order to in order to make a Pokemon egg you need a mama and a daddy so where’d
the daddy so not only did Q bones mom died he had a deadbeat daddy man that’s
kind of sad now that I think about it not to mention cubone where’s the skull
of its mother okay this is what in the heck hey who you callin pinhead who you
callin pinhead I’m dirty Dan today’s just not a fun
time because I’m nasally I’m a messed up and it’s snowing outside even though
yesterday it was 62 degrees I don’t know how I feel about that so I guess I’m
just stuck in here and my Google assistant I will just hang out hey
Google are you in love with me I love you but let’s get more specific one do
you want to answer some questions and find out what kind of team we make sure great let’s start the quiz televised
keep baking competition would you want us to try a weird new flavor or stick to
your Nana’s famous recipe what would you pick new or Nana I’d pick a weird new
flavor if we were sent back in time after being photographed by a haunted
camera would you try to blend in with the local people for profit from your
knowledge of the future prophets have one more question oh if we
work on founding a community garden would you rather be in charge of
deciding how to punish people who snuck in to steal the vegetables or deciding
which flowers to grow what do you pick justice or flowers flowers alright
thanks for playing along I’m ready to tell the world exactly what an awesome
duo we are hey what I think I’ll write a poem about it just give me a second to
get my thoughts together okay I’ve got it where is perfect for each
other as a cat in a cardboard box cat in box a true love story full of joy and
full of glory check around and you will see no better pair than you and me
scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours pretend my flaps are magic doors jump in
jump out jump all around the world will see our love resound so now you know
together we’re as endlessly entertaining as the
Internet’s favorite mean thanks for taking the time to answer my questions
the more I know you the more I love you thanks for playing so apparently I’m now
in a committed relationship with my Google assistant and I had some fun
today so I guess I’d better go spend time with my wife apparently we’re more
entertaining than memes so rather than doing an outro today I’m gonna do my
favorite thing with Google assistant hey Google Talk too fart noises oh you like this next one I want a
relief okay smell you later


  1. Yeahhhhhh, you got real deep with the cue bone side story there. Don’t talk about this issues. 😂

    Is your wife you’re mom? 🤣🤣🤣

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